Showing posts tagged with “june2012”

It’s a such a heart wrenching feeling when you realize that one thing that could make you permanently happy and the only thing you have wanted with all your heart and soul is now gone. That person is drifting away and you want to chase that person but your brain tells you not too. There are so many things you wanna say but you don’t want to because it might make things fall apart even more. You try to strike up a conversation with them when you get the chance, just hoping the vibe you once had comes back again. But eventually you get tired of trying and accept the fact that nothing will ever be the same again. Somehow it’s the worst feeling someone could feel.

But, sometimes, things only happen for the better—maybe he or she never deserved someone like you in the first place. Realize that although it is over, your relationship with that person was unique and special in a lot of ways. Also, don’t regret the time you have had with the people that once made an impact in your life, you have learned from them and they have made you happy. Understand that there is no benefit in holding on to heartache, regret, and hatred toward another person.

Though it’s sad to think that all you have is memories now since they have left, but we all have to move on. Time doesn’t stop, so why should we. Life does go on. If drifting apart from the people you knew so well happens, then it will. If they are supposed to come back into your life, they will too. Encourage your heart that even though love didn’t work out this time, there will be a next time.

Reading notes, memorizing, highlighting, drinking coffee to help me get study on and studying. What a long and draining day. Sadly there are more to come. Ugh Why do I have to study so damn hard just to do good in a class?

Another busy day & another busy week. Busy day, busy day, busy day. No time to waste or spare except for this very second.

I’m practically dedicating all my time in studying now. Today’s supposed to be a rest day since I have no class every friday. I thought I could take a break and finally do whatever it is that I’ve been wanting to do. I don’t think anybody truly knew how hard school was for me this semester, how this whole semester killed me. Consistently getting about 5 hours of sleep a day. Consistently drinking coffee in the mornings just to make it through the school day. Some things have to change. I have no life right now, I’m worrying and I’m stressed out everyday.

I’m trying really hard not to go crazy but I know I can do it. I will do it. So stressful. Gosh don’t you wish you had my week?

Father God, I am quite unsure of my studies, Lord. I am so worried and anxious about it. I am scared and I have absolutely no confidence on my own wisdom, Lord. But Lord, I give it to you. I find it difficult to cope up with all the subjects and my memory power often fails me. Give me the focus and discipline that only you can give. I totally rely upon you God for you are the treasure house of all wisdom and knowledge. Without Your help and guidance I can never achieve any success Lord and You are the only capable one of helping me out.

I can’t manage my study timing now, my mood have been really messed up for some reasons. Help me Lord. I’m losing myself thinking about this every minute of every hour of every day. I need you to help me feel more confident going into the test and relax a bit so I can concentrate. Please strengthen my memory power and grant me Your grace to grasp my subjects easily.

I completely surrender myself to You and plead for Your divine guidance. Please remove this fear from my mind and fill me with confidence. I know I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Keep me in peace so that I can do well in my exams.

I thank You for helping me Lord. Thank you for always being there and allowing me to rely on you. I take success in Your mighty name. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

School - all the tests, all the studying, all the work, all the homework, all the stress. I’ve officially been mentally exhausted to the max. I literally feel like I’m suffocated at the moment. Urggh, I’m tired of school. Seriously am. When can I go around and have all this weight taken off my shoulders? When can I go home and just drop on my bed and sleep without worrying that I’ll lose studying time? Every single day I would always ask myself if I ever will get out of this prison hole. I just have to keep reminding myself that I am here to get a degree. This is the path that I must take. I want this. I want this. I am going to try to continue to think this way. I just hope and pray that I don’t let worry stress get to me more than I’ve let it.

I’m sad that I’m growing up in a generation that doesn’t send letters and hardly gives each other cards.

1.  I always try to be optimistic with other people, but I’m a pessimistic when it comes to myself which is why I have an extreme fear of not being good enough.
2. I spend the majority of my time in my room.
3. My biggest pet peeve is being ignored. I hate it so much.
4.  I get along way better with guys than I do with girls.
5. I do not get offended easily, unless I am being compared to or a family member is being insulted in some way.

I always tell myself to study a week before an exam, review and read at night. Gonna study before hand next time, and always not leave things to last minute. But I guess I always find myself back in the same positions. Not prepared and always cramming and doing everything and playing the procrastination and regretful game I always do.

Its amazing how much of a day I can completely waste when I’m suppose to be studying. I’m supposed to be studying. But my friend Procrastination is always around me. I have lots of things to do. I mean, really really really lots of things. I don’t know what I’ll do. I’m so tired and I’m so addicted to tumblr. I need to focus on my priorities, which is exam. And not waste time surfing instead. I have literally been doing everything and nothing, while at the same time convincing myself what I’m doing is right. I am good at ignoring the work I should do. I feel so digusted with myself. Procrastinating all the time. I’ll do it tomorrow, I’ll do it tomorrow. Urghh! I like to think of myself as an optimist when in reality I’m just a lazy ass excuse maker. I’m procrastinating way too much. I just want to be more and more inspired because anxiety and regret is taking over my thoughts.

Is there any cure to procrastination? I have lots of work to do, but I don’t feel like. Enough procrastinating, I MUST do some work. I’ve made a promise to myself that I am going to break the mould from now on.

Yes, Procrastination please go away! Thank you Damme. :)